- Editor/Writer/Pundit:
- Tom Wilmot
- National Affairs:
- Duke Stockton
31 January 2007
Parallel Universe Quickly Becomes Dumber Than Ours
Starting back in 2003, when it experienced a tax revolt, it became apparent that Dork Homeworld Second Life would soon become as tedious and bland as the real world all these folks were logging on to escape from.Anyone that's spent more than a minute in any community oriented web spot can attest that it's just like real life, if events in real life ran at warp speed and were dealt with the emotional control of a two year old.
Since that time, various articles regarding cyber-hookers, raging promiscuity and virtual BDSM in SL have appeared in news organs experiencing slow news days or catering to a rather slack jawed subscription base. What has simmered below the radar until last Saturday was the growing political force of Second Life.
First evidence of the deep conviction and heartfelt commitment of these digital freedom fighters surfaced last summer when pixel world real estate mogul Anshe Chung was interviewed on Cnet in avatar form (yes, it's JUST as pathetic as it sounds) and the interview was interrupted by an attack of flying pink penises. This event has been described by Second Lifers as "as iconographic as the raising of the flag on Iwo Jima".
Um, yeah.
Martin Luther King's Birthday saw the first full-fledged political protest in cyberville, as protesters gathered around the virtual headquarters of right-wing French Front National. Naturally, chanting and sign waving quickly devolved into gunfire, grenades and exploding pigs. Out in Real Life® evidence of this holocaust was felt by vanishing bandwidth, glitching servers and lagtime beyond belief. (Those damned pig bombs gobble up a lot of bytes).By the time it was all over, the building was gone and the Front Nationalers all disappeared into tiki bars and massage parlours. The overwhelming success of this political action inspired a bunch of deeply committed loonies to form Avatars Against the War - a pixilated political action group. As their official instructions explained:
"Protesters should meet at RootsCamp first, where we will have a teleporter that will send people to the right spot."
Too bad the REAL D.C. doesn't have teleporters - anyone whose ever been stuck on the 13th Street bridge at rush hour can attest to that. Of course, the REAL D.C. doesn't consist of an entire populace of ripped abdomens and women built like the proverbial brick whitehouse.
After milling around for an hour, waving animated signs and passing instant messages to hook up later, everyone dispursed, knowing that their stern protest had given Bush and the rest of his evil henchmen pause.If it wasn't for the fact that the President is still addicted to Everquest.
